Drifting Off on a Dream

August 22, 2010

The moon is hung

Stars brightly lit across the sky

I rest my head on my pillow

Wrap myself under my quilt

Longing to sleep I quiet my mind

Pushing aside events of the day

And tasks to do tomorrow

Slowly I lose myself

In thoughts of you

Your sweet face and gentle hands

Loving kisses and soft caresses

The sound of your voice

Whispering to me

Like music filling my soul

Sweet memories of times we’ve shared

Keeping you always with me

With a heart that is smiling

And full with your love

Soon I find myself

Drifting off on a dream


Barbara M © August 2010

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A Good Deed

August 19, 2010

I performed a good deed today.  Not the first good deed I have performed in my life, but one that made me reflect on my upbringing and my family, hence the reason I chose to share this one.  I was sitting in McDonald’s next to the bus terminal, having a quick bite before catching my bus to my sister’s lakeside cottage.  Having been sick the week before, which necessitated delaying my vacation, I was very much looking forward to getting away for a few days.  And I was feeling very grateful that I had a place to go to relax and enjoy myself with family and friends.

I was almost finished my breakfast when a young man walked in and asked if anyone would like to buy a token for the local transit system for $2.00.  He was short cash for his Greyhound bus ticket.  No one said anything; in fact no one acknowledged his existence.  Instead they gave him a cursory glance and continued on with their conversations, eating their breakfasts and pretending he didn’t exist.

While on a rare occasion I have tossed spare change into the hands and hats of homeless people on the street, I am not one to normally give cash to transient people.  I’ve grown up in a city where areas of the downtown area have heavy pockets of transients begging for change for a coffee or a sandwich.  Often times the cash is wanted for drugs or liquor, not the coffee or sandwich they say they are hungry for.  It doesn’t take long before you learn to tune them out as you go about your daily business.  Especially the ones you see over and over again, day after day, year after year on the same street corner.  Makes one wonder just how lucrative is it to sit on a corner and beg for change.

For some reason, and I’m not sure why, I opened up my purse and motioned the young man over.  He hurried over to my table and thanking me, placed the bus token down in front of me.  I asked him how short he was for his ticket.  Seven dollars he told me.  A rather odd dollar amount to use if he was scamming funds for some other venture I thought.  No matter, I had already decided to help him.  I reached into my wallet and pulled out $7.00 and gave it to him.  He thanked me profusely; I’m sure he couldn’t believe his good luck.  Before he could walk away I returned the bus token to him.  “Here” I said, “take it; you may need it if you come back to town.”  I think he seemed more startled at that most of all; that a complete stranger would give him the funds he needed to purchase his bus ticket, for nothing in return.

He thanked me over and over, all the way as he walked out of the restaurant to catch his bus.  I told him you’re welcome and said he could thank me more if some day he would do a favour for someone in need, to pay the favour forward.  With a smile he assured me he would and he was gone.

Though I couldn’t quite make out what they were saying, I could hear others in the restaurant talking about the young man they had ignored, and how he was probably going to use the money I gave him for drugs.  I paid them no mind and slowly finished my breakfast.  Leaving the restaurant a shortly after, I smiled at the other patrons and wished them a nice day, the very ones who had just been talking about me and made my way to the bus terminal to catch my bus.

Was the young man going to use the money I gave him towards buying drugs, or was he really going to use it to purchase a bus ticket?  If it was for a bus ticket, where was he travelling to?  To visit a family member?  Friends?  A girlfriend?  Perhaps he was going home.  I would never know the answer to any of these questions.  And to me it really didn’t matter.

All that mattered to me was that I had performed a random act of kindness to a stranger.  Behaving in the manner to which I was raised.  Taught from a young age by my parents that it is much easier to be nice to someone than not.  Favours don’t have to be large and extravagant.  Sometimes the simplest of favours can brighten someone’s day.  Whether it is simply holding a door open for someone, giving up your seat on a bus, allowing someone to go ahead of you in the check-out line at the grocery store because they only have a few items and your cart is full.

A lifetime of favours and small acts of kindness that are now coming back to my parents in their senior years, not because they are owed, not even necessarily from the people they performed good deeds to over the years, but from their friends, strangers too, simply because they are good people and have always lived their lives this way.

And even still they continue to live their lives being kind to others.  My father, frail and not in the best of health, confined to a wheelchair now and a nursing home; and yet he is one of the favourites amongst the nursing staff.  No matter how ill he may be feeling on any particular day, he always has a smile for them, a thank you; always telling them to take their time if he needs something – he can wait.

And my mother, who has had to adjust to living alone now, still she thinks of others.  Recently when visiting her for dinner one night she made an extra plate, placed plastic wrap over it and left her apartment, saying she would be back in a moment.  When she returned I asked her where she had gone and who was the dinner for.  It was for her 90-year old neighbour who also lived alone, but was in much frailer health than my mother.  Apparently whenever my mother was home and cooked dinner she took a plate to her neighbour.  And had been doing so for years.  What was one dinner here and there my mother said?

That my mother did this did not surprise me.  That my father was a favourite of the nursing staff didn’t surprise me either.  I had been blessed to be raised by the two of them, witnessing years and years of good deeds and random acts of kindness.  The kind of good deeds my siblings and I try to pass along to the next generation.  The kind of good deeds I hope to continue performing as I continue my journey through life.  The kind of good deeds I hope keep getting paid forward.

Barbara M  ©  August 2010

Someone

August 10, 2010

Someone for me to cherish and adore

Who will cherish and adore me in return

Someone I can put my faith and trust in

Share my smiles and laughter with

Give me their shoulder to lean on when I am sad

And will kiss away my tears

Someone I can be myself with

Sharing all of myself, good and bad

Someone who believes in me

Never gives up on me

No matter what

Even when I am erratic and unreasonable


Someone I can be quiet with

No words needed to be spoken

Someone I can be silly with

And they will laugh with me, not at me

Someone who will hold me in their arms

As we dance to a slow love song

Laying together on the couch watching a movie

Reading to each other

Sharing endless kisses

And making love

Someone who will protect and cherish my heart

As if it was their very own


Someone who will give me their love

Someone who will share all of these things

Who will put their faith and trust in me

Who will let their guard down and know

I will never judge them no matter what

Someone who will let me hold them

Comfort them when they are sad

And let me kiss away their tears

Someone who will share their smiles and joy with me

Someone who will let me love them completely

Until the end of time

For me, that someone is you


Barbara M ©August 2010

Walk With Me

August 8, 2010

Walk with me

Place your hand in mine

Side by side we’ll each take steps

Our love will lead the way

The journey is just beginning

No need to rush it through

Each day a new discovery

Treasured moments spent with you

Share with me

Your hopes and dreams

And I will tell you mine

Together we can bring them to life

As long as you’re by my side

Have faith in us and trust our love

Nothing can tear us apart

Let us dwell where we belong

Our souls entwined

Safe in each other’s heart


Barbara M ©August 2010

Words

August 6, 2010

Words of wisdom

Words of thought

Words that make me ponder

Words of happiness

Words of wit

Words that make me laugh

Words of solace

Words of comfort

Words that make me calm

Words of glee

Words of joy

Words that make me smile

Words of friendship

Words of confidence

Words that make me happy

Words of love

Words of hope

Words that make me dream

Words of passion

Words of ecstasy

Words that make me quiver

Words of faith

Words of encouragement

Words that awaken my soul

Words spoken from your lips

Forever residing within my heart


Barbara M © August 2010

But a Dream

August 5, 2010

You were her favourite dream.  The one she clung to when life was chaotic.  The one she held deep in her heart and soul.  She only had to close her eyes to see you, to feel you.  It was as if you were right next to her.  She could smell your scent; feel your breath on her neck as you held her close.  Every detail of you and the love you shared came to life.  A love so strong and true it was displayed in the simplest of actions.  The way you always reached for her hand, whether walking side by side on a leisurely stroll along the lake, or sitting together on the couch at the end of a busy day.  Shared laughter and whispered secrets.  Gazing into your eyes and seeing the love and desire you had for her.  Her love and desire for you reflecting back from hers.  Your strong shoulders always ready for her to lean on when needed.  And her arms were always open to hold you.  Not a day went by where you didn’t tell her you loved her; or she you.

She loved waking up in your arms each morning after a passion filled night.  How you gently brushed the bangs out of her eyes and greeted her with a morning kiss and tender caress.  Holding her close to you and filling her up with your love.  Separated during the day physically while at work, but still connected through a text message or an e-mail; simple little messages just to say ‘hey darling, I’m thinking of you’, or ‘what do you fancy for dinner?’  Returning home at the end of the day to each other’s arms; sharing a glass of wine and chatting about the day’s events, making plans for the coming weekend.  And always ending the day the way it started, together, loving each other and falling asleep wrapped around one another afterwards.

It was a combination of so many things that made her love you so completely; the larger than life moments and all the little ones in between.  The trust you both had in each other; the way you made her smile and laugh; the always knowing you’d both be there for one another, no matter what – through good times and bad.  Two souls and hearts as one.  You were the one she had waited her whole life for.  Her prince from the fairytales she adored as a little girl come to life.  It wasn’t until she opened her eyes and the cold reality of her aloneness that she realized you were but a dream, and didn’t exist at all.

Barbara M © August 2010